论文陈述怎么写？Thesis Statement常见错误有哪些？
Thesis Statement即论文陈述，美国大学课堂上给论文陈述评分时，它通常占你成绩的 40% 到 50%。小编常常跟同学们强调Thesis Statement在英语学术写作中的重要性，无论是在课堂上还是在实际应用中。Thesis Statement是一篇文章的灵魂，需要全面概括全文的主要内容。 同时，也只是短短的一句话，并不冗长。 因此，一篇好的论文不是一朝一夕就能完成的，而是需要多次修改。 今天澳洲代写从部分学生的日常练习中，来看看中国留学生经常犯的论文陈述错误。
不够全面
原稿：
① I always thought that climate change was not the issue that an individual like me can deal with. ② It should be the jobs of governments and enterprises. ③ I thought that the issue won’t affect us in short term, but after the course, I learnt that the issue isn’t the same as I thought before. ④ Climate change has already changed our life in many different ways. ⑤ Luckily, the issue could be solved easily if everyone is willing to take action.
修改：
Climate change is not just a remote issue for governments and enterprises but an urgent matter that requires everyone’s response and effort to avoid further dire impacts upon many aspects of individuals’ lives.
Thesis 必须是一个句子。 在这里，作者用五句话清楚地表达了自己的观点，但实际读者只会找一句话作为全文。 因此，无论用哪句话作为论文，都会出现不完整的错误。 修改后，将这5个句子的内容精炼，用一句话表达清楚。 另外，原文也犯了第一人称的错误，学术写作中常用第三人称。
讲述事实，而不是自己的观点题
There are many conflicts between those classes every year and this could be considered an example of the term “othering”.
修改：
The caste system in India has always been not only ① one of the major causes of social discrimination and class conflicts but also ② a long-lasting hindrance upon the nation’s economic development, a reality that proves that ③ it is a fitting example of “othering” in both historical and current society.
论文的初稿不仅有点薄，而且读起来更像是事实而不是观点。 修改后，其基本含义不变，仍然谈到种姓制度在印度的危害，但不仅更全面地涵盖了下文要讨论的三个问题，而且给读者的印象是： 作者的观点而不是事实。 学生应该记住，事实绝不是论文陈述。
原稿：
缺少thesis statement
原稿：
The article “Observation on What Is Language” is written by Richard Nordquist on May 25, 2019. It defines the term “language” which refers to “the grammar and other rules and norms that allow humans to make utterances and sounds in a way that others can understand”(Language). …
修改：
“Observation On What Is Language,” written by Richard Nordquist on May 25, 2019, strengthens the conviction that human language, with its complexity and beauty, is more than a communication tool but a key to define us and distinguish us from others.
The article defines the term “language” as the combination of “the grammar and other rules and norms that allow humans to make utterances and sounds in a way that others can understand”(Language). …
在中文语文教育和中国文化观念的影响下，学生有时会觉得一开始就不应该把态度表达清楚，尤其是在写书评或与人辩论时。似乎这会太生硬和不礼貌，所以他们应该含蓄地表达自己的意见，以表示对他人的尊重。所以，在写一篇文章的时候，有时我不会在开头表达我的论文，而是把论文放在整篇文章的结尾。
在英语学术写作的第一段中，应该清楚地表达自己的立场和观点。这不是粗鲁或人身攻击，而是现实和实事求是。
这个学生在他的初稿中犯了这样一个错误。在第一段，他立即进入了一个例子，并在最后一段展示了他的态度，让读者一直猜测到最后。改版后，虽然第一段的介绍还是比较薄弱，但至少它清楚地告诉读者整篇文章是关于什么的，然后下一段开始用例子来演示。
范围太广了，不够具体
原稿：Throughout the movie Brave Heart, the life journey of the protagonist, William Wallace, and his Scottish followers during the Scotland and England War demonstrateindividual freedom, nationalism and religious faith in many ways.
修改：The award-winning movie Brave Heart not only narrates the life journey of the historic Scotland hero, William Wallace, but also demonstrates how he and his Scottish followers transform from individuals pursuing personal freedom to the defenders of national independence, united together against religious and political oppression under the same banner of nationalism.
这是对奥斯卡获奖影片《勇敢的心》的影评。 原论文虽然列出了下面全文描述的类别，但给观众的感觉是范围太广，“野心”太大。 如果不出意外，光是那个时期宗教信仰的影响就足以填满一本书。
这样的论文显然不适合短片影评，而且电影本身也不是中世纪社会的百科全书。 个人自由、民族主义……但它显然侧重于英雄及其追随者，范围要具体得多。 它还读起来更像是作者的意见，而不是像初稿那样的事实陈述。
观点表达不清晰
原稿：Although himself advocating for the application of reasons in the movement, in his book, Montesquieu constantly ridicules individuals’ ability to fully apply rationality and reasoning in their judgments.
修改：Although himself advocating for the application of reason, in his book, Montesquieu constantly questions and ridicules individuals’ capacities for making independent reasoning and judgment while they are under a multitude of influences ranging from religious oppression and cultural vanity to personal background and human emotions.
这篇文章是评论《启蒙运动》法国著名思想家孟德斯鸠的一部特定文学作品，虽然原创论文指出了作品的主题和孟德斯鸠主要思想之间的矛盾，但没有说为什么，也没有说 为了理解全文的核心，我解释了答案是什么，孟德斯鸠为什么在这部作品中打自己的脸？
这样的论文读起来很模糊，读者不知道作者的观点是什么。 修改后，添加了一部分红色字体，明确指出了原因。 这四个原因是作者的观点，下面的文字也是基于这四个原因。 而读者，不管他们同意与否，至少知道作者的立场。
不够简洁
原稿：①America’s economic prospect for China and ②its political ideal resulted in its insistence on building a coalition Chinese government centered on the Kuomintang during 1944 and 1945, despite acknowledging the gradual corruption of and the consequent public discontent on the Kuomintang. This unchanging attitude, together with ③American former ambassador Hurley’s overconfidence on the Nationalist-Communist relationship, led to the enlarging breach between the Communist Party with both the Kuomintang and American allies.
修改：America’s ①deep-rooted distrust of Communism and ②economic prospect for China resulted in America’s favoritism with Chinese Nationalist party despite the latter’s corruption and unpopularity. Coupled with the ③overly-optimistic situation assessment, these policies inevitably led to a rushed, doomed peace treaty and America’s ultimate failure in China.
这是历史课的期末论文，探讨美国的对华政策为何在南北战争期间最终失败。文章全文较长，涉及的内容和观点较多，所以原论文虽然全面涵盖了文章的三个主题和部分具体内容，但篇幅过长。同学们要注意的是，论文陈述在结构上不仅是一两句话，而且字数也不能太长，一般在50字以内，而这里的原论文几乎和一段一样长。改版后，三大核心内容主题没有变化，都被收录了，只是句子表达提炼了很多。
这只是第一次修订。事实上，论文可以修改得更精炼，这将考验学生的造句能力。
下面是一些学生在实际写作中经常犯的论文错误，而学生往往没有意识到这一点，从而导致各种错误和浪费分数。我们希望通过我们的“罗嗦”，同学们在以后的写作中可以更加注意论文的陈述。
